How To Save My Marriage: How To Save My Marriage.

Do you remember when you took your wedding vows and said I DO? That should be your guide on how to save your marriage. Because there are things in life that you cannot control and you do not know if you will be confronted with the question do you want to know how to save your marriage? If you reached that point in your married life, you have to brace yourself because like life, it is not easy.

It is a fact of life that some marriage works and sadly some do not. Reasons could vary from simple disagreement and incompatibility to complicated jealousy and unforeseen factors that may greatly affect the marriage. Trying to look for ways on how to save your marriage can be exhausting and a nightmare. You might not know who to turn to, what to sort out, and how you can connect with your spouse again so you can both save the marriage. But if your marriage is at the point where you will have to know how to save your marriage that is still a good sign. Why? Because you still want to work out things with your spouse. That means you still value what you have and not give up so easily. You do not easily give in to divorce, legal separation, or annulment of your marriage.

Accept that Life is Not Perfect and Nobody Is

One of the ways on how to save your marriage is to accept the fact that you did not marry a perfect person to live in a perfect life. You are not living in a fantasy world. Married life is not always about sparks and flowers. What drawn you to your partner in the first place? There must be something in there that person that is lovable for you to fall for that person and decided to spend the rest of your with. For sure, you will always find faults at each other and that is because nobody is perfect. If you are going to look for faults and imperfections, you will always find one.

How to save your marriage when your incompatibilities are getting in the way? The key is to focus on the good side of the person. It does not mean you will keep blind eyes for your spouse's faults. No. You simply are embracing each other's imperfection in order to save your marriage. Life is too short to concentrate on the bad side of things. You will know how to save your marriage when you realize that you are not perfect either so you must not expect your other half to be one.

Communication Bridges the Gap

One of the hardest things in life is when you have no one to share something with. If you two just share the house but not share a life, you have to start talking again. This answers the question how to save your marriage. The problem starts when one of you keep thoughts to yourselves and not open up. So what happens then when you have kept all your thoughts to yourself and like a bubble it will burst all at once? You have your partner in the first place to share your innermost thoughts, your days and nights, and your aspirations. You have a best friend at home that you can talk to if you are only willing to talk. You have to open up but you must also listen

Remember that you are not alone in this marriage. You might have your thoughts but so does your spouse. How to save your marriage when you are deaf to your spouse's voice? Have you ever thought that maybe the problem started when you stopped communicating? Talks should be easy and never confrontational. Confront your fear of being misunderstood but the most important thing is you will open up to your spouse. If he/she will see that you are willing to listen to his/her thoughts and not just focus on yours, brick by brick you two are building the bridge on how to save your marriage.

Forgive Like You Would Want to Be Forgiven

There are actions that really could break the marriage especially when trust and heart is broken. How can you save your marriage if you have been unfaithful in thoughts and in deeds? You have to know that infidelity is the hardest one to forgive. And if you have been the unfaithful one, saying sorry is not enough. You have to put extra effort to let your spouse feel you learned from your mistake. Don't expect this to be easy because trust is something you have to gain and your spouse may have from time to time doubt you. You just have to try even harder to gain trust back.

Now if you are the one who have been cheated on, forgiveness is very essential if you want to know how to save your marriage. You may not forget it, which is understandable. But learning to forgive is the key to heal your wounds. It may be hard, but working on how to save your marriage after one of you cheated can be survived. It will even make your marriage stronger if both of you are willing to forgive each other and work for your marriage one step at a time. Spend some time again in the company of one once in a while. Rediscover the beauty of each other again. You will realize that the good times will always outweigh the bad ones. You will both see what you have been missing all this time and you will not have to look elsewhere to find that happiness that is already in your home.

3 Problems With Marital Therapy (That Therapists Won’t Tell You)

Let me say it here, in writing: I am NOT opposed to marital therapy. I am quite concerned, however, on how marital therapy happens now. I am concerned about the effectiveness of marital therapy. And I am concerned for people who blindly seek out marital therapy, expecting it to help.

If you don’t know yet, Dr. Lee H Baucom has training and background in marriage and family therapy. He spent years, and several degrees, preparing to be a marriage therapist.

"And I was pretty disillusioned to see how ineffective marital therapy, overall, has been shown to be. Statistics are about the bigger view, not the specific therapist with a specific couple", he says. But from the overall view, according to meta analysis of studies, about 75% of people who go to marital therapy still divorce. Only around 10-15% report a positive help.

Now, you see my issues. Why, is this is the primary way of helping a marriage, if it so ineffective? Three reasons: 1) Therapist training, 2) Therapist orientation, 3) Client resistance.

Listen in to this podcast to understand the issues. Then, you can make a better choice about whether therapy makes sense, how to find a good therapist, and how to make sure you and your spouse are truly ready for therapy.

(And if you aren’t, that doesn’t mean there is nothing you can do! That is why he created the Save The Marriage System, and why they offer Relationship Coaching.)

Listen to our free podcast.

4 Marriage Crisis Mistakes To Avoid

A marriage crisis doesn’t ever start as a crisis. It may start as a deficit in action or understanding, inattention, neglect, or some small altercation.

But it can spread over time, engulfing the entire relationship in crisis.

Many times, people tell me, “I should have taken action long ago, but _______.”

Fill in the blank with:

“I didn’t know what to do.”
“I didn’t know we were in trouble.”
“I was afraid to do anything.”
“I was afraid I would make it worse.”
“I shouldn’t be the one who has to do something.”

Mistakes along the way begin to escalate the marriage problem, until it is a full-blown marriage crisis. Then what?

Then, you have to avoid these 4 mistakes. (My bet is that the first mistake has already been made.)

Learn what the mistakes are, and how to avoid or correct them.

DO NOT WAIT!! TAKE ACTION NOW!!!

LISTEN TO OUR FREE PODCAST.